Getting pulled over for speeding sucks big time. 21. The officer walks up to him and says "look buddy, its 16:50 on a Friday night and I knock off in 10 mins. Suddenly he heard sirens behind him. Last month I helped him stretch his ass hole to 18 inches. The officer says, "I clocked you at 80 mph, sir." The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you’re signing someone’s cast. The officer approaches the driver's side, opens the door, pulls the driver out, and begins beating him senseless.

There's a blonde driving down the highway and going about 20 over the speed limit. I was going up to my parents house doing like 90 mph on this country road and I got pulled over. How to choose the best walking and hiking shoes?

...and he has a penguin in the front seat. 90 miles an hour.

She replies in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. He says, "I"m just a trying to get dis here pig back to the farmer whose truck dis pig fell.
A cop has pulled a man over for going 150 in a 60. Turns out the officer is also a blonde woman. There was a moment of silence. These 19 hilarious funny speeding ticket quotes for when you get ticketed for speeding is the latest gallery to make your day a little bit better. Then, "Danger, road hazard!" "No, of course not."

Then I fucked up by telling her "and that's not even the drinks talking".

I also enjoy film photography and hiking. Their names are shut up, manners and crap.

When the officer was writing them a ticket, his radio buzzed, "We are looking for two child molesters in a blue SUV. Whichever option you go with, we’ve put together a list 19 of the funniest one-liners and quotes on speeding that you might just relate to anyway. The guy says to the trooper "So do these speeding tickets help fund the State Trooper's Ball"? He kept accelerating. If you’re feeling a little dangerous, you can even use these when you get pulled over – but don’t say we didn’t warn you. "That's.

See TOP 10 witty one-liners. * **. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic.

Speeding jokes. Welcome to The Awesome Daily! Selma was driving when she got pulled over by the highway patrol. The man saw the cop and tried going faster. I thought you were bringing her back.” The trooper frowns. Crap gets scared and jumps out of the car and into the woods next to the road. Cop says "Listen, It's Christmas, I wanna end my shift and go home, and not have to do paper work. One-Liner Jokes. Approaching the car, he noticed that five old ladies were inside, and they looked wide-eyed and terribly pale. You Have Won the Internet. The cop approaches the car and the driver rolls down the window. When he's done he tells the driver, "We don't drive like assholes in Mississippi." The trooper asks what is a 72 inch (6 foot) asshole going to do. 22. he comes up to the man and asks, "why were you speeding today sir?" Guy replies, my wife disappeared 22 years ago, and every time I see a police car I panic: A man in a truck is speeding, looking quite frantic, and gets pulled over by a policeman. Driving to work, a gentleman had to swerve to avoid a box that fell out of a truck in front of him. That desperately needs my help. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. You might as well resign yourself to the fact that the sermon from this cop is gonna take a while. There are a couple of ways to go about this. One day, an order went out to the police departments in the Soviet Union that anyone caught speeding, anyone, no matter who, gets a ticket. The cop yells at him to take it to the zoo, writes.
He asks the man what he does for a living. The man thought to himself “I can outrun this guy.” And stepped on the accelerator.

I was going up to my parents house doing like 90 mph on this country road and I got pulled over. So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over. Just imagine – you’re rushing home with the dog food because it ran out and Yoda hasn’t eaten all day, then you see it: the dreaded cop lights are flashing behind you. You’re perspiring hastily at the thought of getting a ticket. An old man just fulfilled his lifelong dream and bought a Lamborghini.

Absolutely hilarious one liners! i apologize.

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